in this lifetime, do you know why?

it's not like everyday you just feel like listening to acoustic songs
& just forget how life has been for you so far.

i realised that i tend to talk/crap/shout alot, but 'me' talk rarely exist.
it'll will be avoided somehow each time. i like it that way but people can always try.

i think i'm one of the worse person you could ever find in finding words to describe things.
plus, when people say "huh?! again? what?" i'll thought that i've said something wrong or bad
& thus will not repeat what i've just said. yesssssss. might be tall but i'm rather short on confidence & everything.

& people can bring me down easily cause i can get affected by anything.
even though it doesn't relate to me.

i'm very much a vulnerable idiot.

bored

school just ended 2 hours ago & i'm here in the school library
using their desktop and oversized keyboards which im not used to inversely making me look like some retard who doesn't know how to type.

& it's a great environment to be in cause janet is also stalking secretly in friendster!
which, makes me her partner in crime. (and she just did something major against me)

-editted-

anyways, after janet went for her lessons siqi, simone and their friend came and
BOO! me from the back. like damn pain la & not shocked. tsk! then went to the games room to play some weird games. &weird conversations

the moment we sat on a table:
simone: "ARGHHHH!"
siqi: "huh?"
simone: "ARGHHH!"
me: 0.0
simone: "that game!! ARGHHHH! lets try something new."
me: "HAHAHAHAHHA."
the game was super lame then we changed to Taboo.
thus is was me&simone VS. siqi&their friend (i forgot his name, omg)
the first round:
him: "another word for 'ass'"
me: "butt"
siqi: "something"
him: "another word for 'ass'"
simone: "buttocks.. butt...etc..." (she said alot)
me: "omg.. butt laahhh!"
him: "nooo.. LOWER!"
me&simone suddenly shutup & looked at each other...& laughs
me: "ehhh! i cannot think already, start to think dirty already!"
anyways, the answer for that was: BOTTOM!
second round:
siqi: "underwear"
simone: "boxer!"
him: "girl wear one la"
siqi: "very thin"
him: "when people go for BBQ they use also!"
siqi: "HAHAHAHAHAH!"
me: "omgg..BBQ?!"the answer was :THONGS!

oh yess, thanks britney for making me free from any mental derangement.

learn your name

even though this might bruise you
let it burn, let it burn
you gotta let it burn

deep down you know it's best for yourself but you hate the thought.
you know that it's over, you know that it was through
just let it burn.


how many times do you have to lie to yourself, till everything is over?

& i've been dreaming of the latest psp slim.
hahahha in two months, just two months.

how?mycircuitcantwork!

something random but i saw this thing on the table! being the kaypoh i already am, i get to know that it's actually waterbabies. Something like it will grow in water then it will start to 'mate' by them joining each other and then little small ones will be produced and the cycle will repeat all over. kinda lame. child's play and where did all the good videogames go to? =\

School was considerably normal today! Beside the fact that i was being super irritating today. (quotes. Janet) cause i kept on saying stuff to her to make her damn zzzzzz. eg. FATTY BOMBOM!

ok lah, cause i was demoralised by the PDPR circuit cause my circuit didn't work as it should be. and i swear, it's a damn mean thing! soo despite being emo, i decided to make other people feel blahhh too. mean i know, but what the heck? we suffer together k! got MPI circuit for each of us to keep until next semester? dumped it in the locker asap cause it's so bulky!

ok this actually happened quite sometime ago, but i remember bout it only yesterday! it's actually a complain. My ears are always being plugged when i'm on the way home & i would say the volume i would be listening to would be 26. right, kay then i was waiting for the lift an uncle apparently said "hi!" to me but i didn't answer. then he waved and guess what he said?

"i've said hi to you & you didn't even bother to reply? Teenagers nowadays are so arrogant!"

hahahah, wth? like hello.. ok la never mind i let it pass. then yesterday i saw uncle and i bet he saw me but guess what he did? he looked away from me! hahahaha, oh man. petty ah. told my parents bout it and they were like "huh?" chill yo, look at your own daughter for goodness sake? who looks at people from top-to-bottom with that glaring eyes! oh & i've felt soo raped by that eyeball of hers please?

somehow it's my fault, i know but wassup with the stereotyping man?
get yourself a psp and chill at the nearest coffeeshop with a cup of kopi-o!

to those who knows: it's miss siti's father. my ex-geography teacher in lower sec,
who apparently stays as the same block as me. suay

whatsmynameagain?

yesterday was a great day, since my weekends started early.
by 1150am, i'm already out and ready for weekends. and know what! my circuit for pdpr
actually works! like phew. *tap on the back*

afterwhich me&huichi headed towards library cafe to eat our lunch,
i treated her hotdog while she treats me bubbletea! or isit the other way round? hahaha
thanks ya huichi (= simone joined us for awhile.




then me&huichi watched a movie called 'odd girl out' which turns out to be quite real,
if you have a supposedly bestfriend that tortures you indirectly like a flesh eating virus.
tortures indirectly as in, rumors, Instant messaging & all those crap. but somebody said
the show was abit bitchy! =\


what's my name again?

then i flew to SMU to meet the khoo!

spot the khooooooooo in this pic!

rotted around gelatissimo before going off for shopping. no lah, i didnt shop.
was on off mood yesterday. afterwhich i can't remember what happen already.
but i know i was damn tired after like laming/shopping/camwhoring around yesterday!

& i visited wenghua at work yo!

you're alright

results for overseas postings are already out today.
& somehow, i didn't feel disappointed. like the pain doesnt hurt that much?
hahahha, i was kinda surprised by the way i reacted after that.
maybe caused i'm already mentally prepared myself the moment i saw those people that wrote their name on the list? like aiyaa, can predict one la.
esp with my screwed sem 2.1 results but not blaming anyone though.
maybe i've been on top for a bit too while now.It feels good to just feel a dose of failure. somehow. =\

i've also realised that i've always looked forward to those overseas thingy like a escape
from every problems/connections that i have back at home. stupid, i know.
but things changed since the day i've made myself worked towards that.
family are back good at home, friends are indeed good. relationships with others around me have been smooth so far. and i wish things will stay that way. i really do.
i wish to enjoy them now. while it's still there, you see.

6-months? alot of things can happen. i can change & so can you.
soo, i rather enjoy with what i have now before all of us get too fucked up with workloads.
all these are kinda 'emo-wise'. in terms of 'living alone wise' & 'financial wise',
i realised it's far more scary.

take germany for example: they only give you 280Euro for allowance
& for accomodation itself we have to pay 200Euro for accomodation
so you're left with like 80Euro to survive. if that were to be me,
i'll call up my parents every single month to send me money man!
hahah no joke. i suck. talked about being independent huh?

then come again, it's now left with like local industrial attachment & project wise.
and again, the Local Attachment allowances are like errrr.. peanuts?
and there's no pay for overtime. & your grades are like soo soo dependent on the boss ok!
they have always said Project Wise is more for those aiming for Uni.
cause a hell lot of the percentage on it will go to your final project marks. ok so what now?
shit, i hate decision making.

i realised that half of you have no idea what i'm ranting right here, right now.

long story short, i'm ok!

:D

freaky, but i like it

i have always looked forward to afterschool hours!& since, we have like 2 hours of break before a meeting we decided to slack in the games room! ohh yeah, my first time since usually when i go there, it will be damn packed.




& oh yes, if you're wondering why we're playing this uno stacko thing seriously.
we actually had like a forfeit for those who failed. we're serious players please!
eg. doing online tutorials for others, doing tutorials for others & treat to bubbletea & hotdogs.

well, all i know is tomorrow's lunch is settled already. HAHA

after we were done with UNO stacko after like 6 rounds? we played Telepathy. this time siqi came to join us! hohoho. new game lahh, but kinda fun. test how well you & your partner can 'connect'. but i kept on cheating... shhhhh


& shit lahh! me & siqi lost. soo, have to treat them to bubbleteas =\ and also
i have to treat them to hotdogs each for losing in UNO stacko. tsk!

and finally, met up with the rest for the meeting at INNOspark. & this meeting is not the usual meeting caused we camwhore like alot. damn you dune.


i have a feeling that huichi gonna kill me tomorrow.


ohh yes, i forgot to give you my username & password for the online tutorials!
get it from me! lai-lai! but i did like almost all already? unfair.

AZIZAH! GET WELL SOON! (=
just so you know, you scared the hell out of yishan & me!

i saw him today! hahaha, omg & we talked a lil'.
ehh shit, school ends early tomorrow! mambo.. bo bo bo